2018: The Purge.
A long and painful year focused around purging toxic relationships, habits and discovering healing through mindfulness and self awareness. In the past I used to be a fan of change and hadn't had much difficulty uprooting my entire life to move to a completely new city surrounded by strangers. Mainly because I intentionally avoided putting down roots and always had an escape route in the back of my mind for when things got tough. When things weren't feeling totally right in my life or relationships, I made sure it was easy for me to sneak out the back door and abandon any uncomfortable circumstance. This time I knew I had to do something different or I would continue the same patterns and find myself unsatisfied, again, in the end.
So I made the choice not to go anywhere. To stay put. To fight.
I finally understood that the grass wouldn't be greener.
I made the choice to do something different than I ever had before.
I leaned in.
I leaned in and allowed myself to feel, even when it was deeply uncomfortable. I quit trying to deal on my own, or attempt to run away.
I leaned into myself, I leaned in to the pain and I leaned in to those I love and trust and they selflessly shared their strength to help guide me forward.
It's not over yet, and maybe it never will be, but this year I've really learned the truth in the quote "if you want something you've never had- you have to do something you've never done."
It's terrifying, but wildly important for growth.
Cheers to a New Year!
If you haven't already, please be sure to subscribe to Mindful Times by clicking the "Subscribe" button at the top of this page!
If you are sober, or curious about sobriety, we would love for you to join our Facebook group - Mindful Times Facebook Community for support, encouragement, accountability and questions.